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  The Intimate Dating Factor  
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The Intimate Dating Factor

When is the right time to become physically intimate with a dating partner? Ask 100 different people, and you'll likely get 100 different answers. According to advice columnist Claudia Luiz, the timing may never be "right" and your decision to become intimate may present problems no matter what.

Leaders of dating classes and workshops frequently advise singles not to get physically intimate before securing a commitment from their partner. In the privacy of her analyst's office, however, Ms. Luiz discovered that most adults do not heed the experts' advice and wait for commitment to become intimate. Often though and in hindsight, they wished they had heeded the advice to not become intimate before becoming committed. Reasons given included it being very awkward to be on a date with someone you don't know well, be physically intimate and then return to that state of being relative strangers.

Then there are people who do the opposite - they wait too long. That also presents problems, such as pretending you are interested in someone's personality and character when really all you're interested in is their performance between the sheets. Managing the tensions and frustrations you feel may make it difficult to sustain interest in the other person for who they are as well.

Ms. Luiz believes that the timing of beginning physical intimacy is not the most important factor, but discovering what will help couples continue to get to know each other, keeping communication open after they have become intimate. She also believes that the way that couples deal with their decision to become physically intimate is what may make or break the relationship.

So it seems there is not any hard and fast "rule." Go with the flow and enjoy the ride.

Posted by eDatingCentral.com Jun 9, 2007 7:01 am


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