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Love to Twitter or Text?

If you read romance novels set in a much earlier time, such as the English Regency or even the Middle Ages, you would probably have encountered a story where the heroine has to smuggle little notes to her love through her lady's maid, nurse, governess or duenna just so she could communicate with him. Or she would just have to content herself with mail on postage that can take weeks to arrive if they are not hand-carried by a liveried courier.

In today's setting, that situation is not only a touch hilarious but also borders on the ridiculous. Exchanging letters, now cheekily called snail-mail, is now mostly unheard of. If you want to talk to your new dating partner, all you need to do is to turn your cellphone on and make a call, send a text or an instant message or Twitter. If you want to be more elaborate about it, send your love interest an email instead.

If we think about it, we should be able to take comfort in the fact that we can now communicate in a variety of ways today. Really, communication should not be an issue anymore, not when we have advanced so far away from complete reliance on postage or even the landlines. But it seems that for many singles, the fact that there are so many media to choose from in communicating actually presents a barrier to fostering meaningful communications.

Many promising relationships that may have turned out great break down simply because he is a Twitter person while she prefers receiving emails, or because the guy loves saying "I love you" through long phone calls while the gal would have been content with seeing "I <3 U" on her SMS inbox.

But is it really a matter of technological preferences, or is it because the couple cannot find the means to understand each other? Studies have shown that our technological preferences can reveal a lot about our own personalities. Extroverts are said to love the fast turnaround created through texts and IMs while introverts prefer the more elaborate emails and voice calls.

So maybe it is not really just a matter of the gadget or the medium by which we all communicate. Rather, it could be a matter of compatibility and how well we understand each other on a more basic level, with our choice of medium for communication acting as a mask. And mutual understanding, as we all know, is a fundamental element in successful relationships.

Posted by eDatingCentral.com May 15, 2009 5:02 pm


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