The Hookup Revolution
Dating is dead for the 20's something crowd – hooking up came and killed it. In universities and colleges all over the country, campus boys no longer ask girls out to a date. Instead, they try to make eye contact with a girl and have a casual chat with her. If ever they find the girl receptive and appealing, they would ask if she would like to go somewhere quiet. And then, it happens – an encounter that involves nothing but innocent kissing or the whole package itself. After the homogonous deed is done, these two people go on their separate ways as if nothing happened.
But such an encounter is hardly anything; at least it is not for the woman involved. No matter how impersonal the matchup, a between the sheet connection is always emotional for a female. Women are just hard-wired that way. And so, even though she should not expect anything from that brief encounter, she would find herself pining for a phone call from the guy she spent the night with, and probably even hope that this short liaison would lead to something more meaningful.
Unfortunately, relationships rarely blossom from hookups. Single women are aware of this in their minds, but it does not stop them from feeling depressed about the whole thing. The sad thing about it is that match making studies have shown that hooking up can lessen a woman's self-esteem and can make her less trusting of future relationships.
This is so different from the time dating was still the norm. Back when you can always expect an encounter between a man and a woman to have a beginning part, a middle part, and an ending. No matter how badly it turns out to be, the courtship sequence is at least followed and there are no blimps left in the mind or in the heart.
In hookups, however, there never is a beginning, and without beginnings, there would not be endings. Should it really sound strange that hookups are not satisfying?
Posted by eDatingCentral.com Jun 20, 2009 2:08 pm
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